Dealing with Loss: A Tribute to My Grandma

Losing a loved one is never easy, and the recent passing of my grandmother, who lived to be 101, has left a deep void in my heart. She was the last of her generation and played a central role in my life, helping raise me from a baby into adolescence. 

As I reflect on her love, guidance, and the many memories we shared, I find comfort in the lessons she left behind. This article is a tribute to her, and it offers tips for coping with the grief of losing someone who held such a special place in my heart.

Grandma, affectionately known as Dor by all, had the joy of helping raise me from infancy into my teenage years - along with my nine other siblings, guiding us through both the challenges and joys of growing up. She had a unique way of making every moment we spent together meaningful. She embraced the role of caregiver with a love that was both nurturing and wise, always ensuring I knew the value of kindness, compassion, and responsibility. It was as though she could see the person I would grow into long before I ever did.

Her presence was a steady anchor in my life, a source of comfort and wisdom. I grew up knowing that no matter what challenges came my way, I had her gentle guidance to rely on. She had this special way of knowing when I needed support and when I needed space to learn and grow on my own. She celebrated my achievements and comforted me through my disappointments. She was always the life of the party  - always finding humor in the most inappropriate of subjects, not ever afraid of speaking her mind.

Now, as I navigate life without her physical presence, the grief feels heavy, but I know she would want me to carry forward the lessons she instilled in me. Grief is a deeply personal experience, and everyone processes loss differently, but there are ways I’ve found to cope and honor her memory.

Tips for Dealing with Loss

1. Embrace Your Grief 

Allow yourself to feel the weight of your emotions. Losing someone who played such an essential role in your life is bound to be painful, and it’s okay to experience that pain fully. Don't rush the grieving process; it’s a journey, not a destination.

2. Find Comfort in Memories

Reflecting on the moments shared with my grandma brings both tears and smiles. Revisiting the times when she guided me through life helps me stay connected to her. Whether it's looking through old photographs, reading letters, or remembering her voice, these memories can provide comfort.

3. Create Rituals of Remembrance

Whether it’s lighting a candle on special days or creating a personal tribute in her memory, rituals can help you maintain a sense of connection. For me, carrying forward the values she instilled in me—kindness, responsibility, and love—feels like a living tribute to her legacy.

4. Lean on Loved Ones

Family and friends who knew my grandma share in my grief, and talking to them helps. Sometimes, simply being with people who understand the depth of your loss can be comforting. It’s important to reach out and not isolate yourself.

5. Be Patient with Yourself

Grief is unpredictable. Some days are harder than others, and that’s okay. Give yourself permission to experience moments of sadness, but also to find joy again when you're ready. Healing takes time.

6. Seek Professional Support if Needed

Sometimes, the weight of grief can feel overwhelming, and it's perfectly okay to seek the help of a counselor or therapist. Speaking to someone who can guide you through this process can make a significant difference.

7. Honor Their Legacy by Living Well

My grandma always knew I’d grow up to be a caring and responsible person. The best way I can honor her memory is by continuing to live with the same grace and kindness she taught me. Living well and staying true to the values she cherished feels like a way to keep her alive in my heart.

Losing someone like my grandma leaves a void that can never truly be filled. But the love, guidance, and memories she gave me are eternal. I carry her wisdom with me in every decision I make, in every step I take forward. Dealing with loss is difficult, but knowing she’s at peace and that she lived such a full and meaningful life gives me comfort. While her physical presence may be gone, her spirit lives on in everything I do.

Her love remains, and I will always hold her close to my heart.

Rest in sweet heavenly peace, Dor.

In loving memory of Doris Anderson 💛